Thou shalt not covet the B&B owner's daughter

It is traditional on hikes such as these for the rules of 'omertà' to apply. What happens on tour stays on tour. However there are times when fundamental principles of decency and good behaviour supersede those rules. I will let you, the reader, be the judge. 

I came home early  last night leaving Vic behind me in the pub talking to some locals. Regaling them with tales of past triumphs. I felt they were a little young and I left.  In any event I had to do the normal 'night before' preparation checks  ( navigation, confirmation, the gear etc) and I went to bed early. A few hours later I am woken by this crashing noise followed by someone singing the theme of Hawaii Five O.  I look out my window and let's just say things were not as they should be.......